Zorn: I too had a low-paying restaurant job

...and I, too, can't prove it

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Eric Zorn is a former opinion columnist for the Chicago Tribune. Find a longer bio and contact information here. This issue exceeds in size the maximum length for a standard email. To read the entire issue in your browser, click on the headline link above. Paid subscribers receive each Picayune Plus in their email inbox each Tuesday, are part of our civil and productive commenting community and enjoy the sublime satisfaction of supporting this enterprise.

Tuesdays at 11:30 a.m. I talk with WGN-AM 720 host John Williams about what’s making news and likely to be grist for the PS mill. The WGN listen-live link is here.

I cannot prove to you that I worked at The Jolly Tiger. You’re just going to have to trust me

One of the most ridiculous controversies in this or any other election cycle is rooted in Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump’s accusation that his opponent, Vice President Kamala Harris, never worked at a McDonald’s restaurant after her freshman year in college as she says she did.

Trump attempted to highlight this accusation by staging a photo op Sunday at a closed McDonald’s restaurant in Bucks County, Pennsylvania. He pretended to work in the kitchen and serve customers — also fake — at the drive-through window. It was a vapid stunt based on a trivial issue and ended up highlighting Trump’s own phoniness as well as the credulity of numerous media outlets that treated the “work” stint as authentic.

Neither Harris nor the McDonald’s corporation has paperwork to back up the story that she worked under the golden arches in Alameda, California, 41 years ago. Trump and his partisans have seized on this lack of documentation — and her failure to include the job in 1987 job application to be a summer law clerk or in two autobiographical books — as evidence that Harris’ is lying about her blue- collar bonafides.

Some packrats may keep paystubs from their entry level jobs for 40 years and some resumé padders may include every brief period of employment in their applications, but most of us do not. Most of us do have our recent tax returns handy, so when it comes to a refusal to hand over probative documents, Trump’s hiding of his tax returns and medical records is a much bigger deal than Harris’ college employment records.

I worked as a dishwasher at the Jolly Tiger restaurant in Ann Arbor, Michigan in the summer of 1974 — an experience that I don’t believe I’ve ever written about and I almost certainly didn’t include when applying for journalism jobs. The restaurant itself is gone as are any records of this relatively brief stint or of my paper route, my lawn work and my other dishwashing gig.

Sure, I experienced first hand the manifestly obvious truth that many people have to work hard, mind-numbing jobs for comparatively low wages, but I wouldn’t claim this makes me more or less relatable, compassionate or insightful. Empathy can be gained directly or fostered abstractly.

Trump grew up wealthy, inherited a fortune and has never worked a low-wage job, but neither that nor his pathetic stunt Sunday makes him any more or less able to understand and address the needs of everyday working people.

Footnote: The Jolly Tiger was part of a chain of about 1,000 Denny’s-like restaurants known as Sambos. The name was a combination of the names of founders Sam Battistone Sr. and Newell Bohnett, but the chain used decor from “The Story of Little Black Sambo,” a 19th-century children’s book that traded on offensive racial stereotypes. Accordingly, the name became The Jolly Tiger in a dozen or so enlightened cities such as Ann Arbor. In 2020, the last remaining Sambo’s changed its name to "Chad’s.”

Fogey math

Last weekend I attended the 50th anniversary celebration of the University of Michigan’s New England Literature Program — a six-week, spring term series of classes for about 40 undergraduates held at a summer camp in rural New Hampshire.

I went for the third and fourth years of the program — 1977 and 1978 — and enjoyed talking with students from the 50th year of the program, comparing experiences and swapping stories. But I couldn’t help but think that when I was 19, someone who’d been on the program 47 years ago would have been there in 1930 — even before my father was born.

I often make such calculations when interacting with much younger people just to remind myself how they see me, because otherwise I’m tempted to fuzz up the difference in my mind.

A good friend of my vintage who came with me to the event quipped, “I feel more like an exhibit at this reunion than an attendee.”

Notes and comments from readers — lightly edited — along with my responses

On Trump’s virtues or lack thereof

Big response last week to the lead item in the Picayune Plus, “Does Donald Trump have three virtues?” in which I commented on Vice President Kamala Harris’ flummoxed response to being asked to name three virtues of her rival in next months’s presidential election. I frankly couldn’t think of one. Here are just a few of the letters/comments:

Patricia Cole — Temperance? Trump apparently doesn't drink alcohol.

Zorn — That meets one definition of temperance, but the broader definition is self-control, moderation and restraint. So … no.

Mark K. — I absolutely abhor everything that Trump is and represents, but if forced to name one or two admirable qualities he has, I'd say confidence and resilience. He is the epitome of a confidence man, with complete lack of any semblance of shame or even a capacity to accept being wrong, so maybe at that level it crosses into vice territory. But having that confidence in the reality that he makes up in his mind and the ability to stick with it and promote it regardless of its disconnect from the actual world is amazing. He's been able to convince half the country that the sky is green and water is dry and objectively that's impressive and I only wish Democrats had some of that ability. If only people of better character and with better intentions had those qualities.

A Bertrand Russell quote comes to mind: “The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.”

David Leitschuh — I fully acknowledge that Trump is arrogant, needlessly offensive and has the emotional temperament of a 2-year-old.

But a virtue I see and admire in Trump is strength. Strength evidenced when, after an intended assassin's bullet grazed his ear and bloodied his face, his immediate reaction was to rise up with his fist in the air and say “Fight!” The strength and courage to continue his campaign with daily public events after a second assassination attempt and the knowledge that the Iranian government has also planned his assassination.

Yes, Trump does have character flaws, but I and about half the country are prepared to vote for him because of the likely policies under a Trump administration as opposed to the likely policies under a Harris administration. And now I do respect him for his strength.

Zorn — Courage? The dude won’t even sit for a “60 Minutes” interview and he got pounded so badly at the first debate with Harris he declined her offer for a second debate. He shouted “Fight!” sure, but fight who? The young deranged Republican man who just took a potshot at him? You confuse stubbornness and reckless arrogance with strength. And Harris was brave enough to give an interview to Fox News. Anyone think brave, brave, brave Sir Donald will sit for MSNBC?

Reader Beth Bales points out that Trump fielded the same question about Harris. Here was his answer:

I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan. I think she's harmed our country horribly. Horribly. At the border, with inflation, with so many other things. But she seems to have an ability to survive. She was out of the race and all of a sudden she's running for president. That's a great ability that some people have and some people don't have.

She seems to have some pretty long-time friendships. I don't call that an ability. I call that a good thing. And she seems to have a nice way about her. I mean, I like the way, you know, some of her statements, some of the way she behaves in a certain way. But in another way, I think it's very bad for our country. Very bad for our country.

Foul means in the school board elections

Steve Julstrom — Regarding the dirty campaign tactic where allies of the Chicago Teachers Union are sending out mailers claiming that candidates who don’t support the union’s agenda will “dance to Donald Trump’s Project 2025 agenda.” I’d really like to hear the 38th Ward Democratic Organization’s justification for that claim. I sent it back to their email as an attachment asking, “Are you proud of this?” I haven’t heard back from them.

Zorn — I’m generally a union guy, but this pitch was so distasteful to me that I’m planning to vote for the woman who was attacked in the mailer. I also tried to get a response from the mudslingers, but they didn’t reply to an email query.

Bob E. — You wrote, “CPS faces enormous challenges educating children from disadvantaged backgrounds who bring special challenges to the classroom” in criticizing those who favor more school choice. But what's your solution to educating these children, such that their reading, writing and mathematics skills are adequate?

You wrote, “It often strikes me that those who seem most animated by the idea that children from low-income families deserve the same choice in education that children from higher-income families have seem blithely unconcerned that low-income children and families have almost no choice at all when it comes to health care.” I'm all for universal health insurance in this country, but that's a conversation for another day. and it's just a diversion from whether more school choice for more people of limited means could and would produce better literacy and better numeracy.

Why do you avoid the conversation of the value of school choice?

Zorn — I don’t avoid it. I’ve long argued that it’s incumbent on those who favor spending public money for private school tuition or funding alternative charter schools that drain population and resources from neighborhood schools are either wittingly or unwittingly undermining public education in neighborhood schools. I always ask, “What is the secret sauce at private and charter schools? Why do they often have better student outcomes? And when they do, shouldn’t we be trying to replicate that secret sauce for all children in every school?

I’m willing to listen. I don’t think educrats and teachers unions have all the answers. But if the answer is just skimming off the children of the wealthy and/or highly motivated parents, that really isn’t an answer at all.

Love for ‘Lover, Lover,’ the tune of last week

Monica Metzler — I loved “You Don’t Treat Me No Good,” (aka “Lover, Lover”) last week’s tune of the week. So happy to hear it again. Really surprised to read it was a hit in Australia but barely registered here given that I am not, and never have been a great follower of good music yet I remember it well and loved the sound of Sonia Dada, so had just assumed it was a big hit.

Ben Segedin —- Your mention of Sonia Dada brought back memories. I used to see the trio play frequently after work in the Chicago Avenue subway station. They covered a lot of great soul and Motown classics. I would let multiple trains pass by so that I could continue to listen to them. When the subway approached, they would switch from whatever song they were playing to their rendition of the Impressions' "People Get Ready." I also dug their version of Curtis Mayfield's "Gypsy Woman." I loved their harmonies, but I remember Sam Hogan's booming voice. It was like he slipped into another gear.

Cate Plys — Wow. I’d forgotten about Sonia Dada. This song is stunning. What a shame they didn't hit it big like they deserved! Gonna start playing them on Apple Music, which I have because after my kids glomming onto my Netflix, Hulu and HBO, my daughter created an Apple family, added me, and now I can glom off her Apple Music. I thought I was getting by just fine with music I owned, but it's pretty great actually.

Geri Yaccino — Just sayin’, I have always loved “Lover, Lover.”

Zorn — It’s time for some other artist to cover “You Don’t Treat Me No Good.” It’s incredibly catchy. Here it is again:

Peter Zackrison — Eric, you keep asking for music after the year 2000 and then you keep posting tunes prior to 2000 Okay by me, but why have the rule? Better yet, ask for post 2000 music for one section and then anything prior to 2000 in another. Why not have a pre-2000 music section?

Zorn — The reason I ask for tunes from this millennium is that my personal musical tastes are somewhat arrested. It’s a request, not a rule. Adding another music section would infuriate those who already think the Picayune Sentinel is too damn long.

Will D.E.I. obsession render some Democratic candidates DOA?

JakeH . — I urge everyone -- especially our more progressive friends -- to check out the long New York Times Magazine expose about DEI run amok at the University of Michigan. (gift link). The article does not use the word "woke" once, but when people like me complain about woke ideology capturing institutions, this is what we mean. I second Eric's claim that should Democrats lose in a few weeks, this sort of nonsense will be among the important reasons why. Harris delivered a brilliant speech at the DNC, but she has done little else to distance herself from the sort of progressivism exemplified by the DEI mob at Michigan. She thus allows persuadable voters to assume that she really is the woke warrior she has posed as in the past, that she's therefore someone who doesn't share their basic values, and that maybe it's better to go with the devil we know.

Zorn — The goal of increasing minority participation in academia and other high echelons of society is important and laudable, yet its advocates have a tendency to be insufferable, obtuse, prickly and overly censorious to the point of punitive.

(In 2020) the law school’s dean, Mark West, released a note about “the senseless killing of yet another Black person, George Floyd” and “redoubling our clear commitment to diversity, equity and inclusion.” Students blasted him on Twitter for not using the phrase “Black Lives Matter.” … In the English department, in the days after Floyd’s murder, a student named Dylan Gilbert decided it was time to say something publicly about a fiction class she took the previous year with Scott Lyons, a professor there. Lyons had read aloud a paragraph from the William Faulkner short story “Barn Burning,” in which an embittered white tenant farmer utters a racial slur. The passage evokes how racial hatred bound impoverished whites to the wealthy elites who exploited them. Gilbert, who is Black, collected her belongings and left the room.

Field goal matters

Garry Spelled Correctly — I think they should ban any field goal from past the 50 yard line.

Zorn — And I think they should forbid a team from punting once it has crossed the 50.

Marty G. — If the NFL adopts your suggestion to add a 4th point for long field goals, shouldn't they also reduce the value of very short field goals to 2 points when some lily-livered coach won't try for a first down with 4th and inches on the 3 yard line?

Zorn— I’ll allow it.

The week’s best visual jokes

Here are some funny visual images I've come across recently on social media. Enjoy, then evaluate:

Which of the above visual jokes is the best?

There’s still time to vote in the conventional Quip of the Week poll!

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